Friday, July 2, 2010

claremont, city of trees and felonies

This article is just too, too sweet. All of Claremont's efforts to be a classy joint are for naught -- turns out a prominent citizen was smuggling arms to Somalia. I would say, "You're slayin' me here!" except that I wouldn't wish to be taken literally.

The question remains: What international crimes do you think Pomona's seemingly-upstanding citizens might be hiding? I've done a fair bit of smuggling myself -- cheese from England, sausage from Germany (minds out of the gutter, people!), drugs in Asia back in my wild youth. Perhaps our John sold nuclear-weapon plans to Ptomania in his own wild youth? Or Chainsaw Ed, not Ramón Mercader, was the man behind the icepick that killed Leon Trotsky?

Come on, we can't let Claremont get one over on us this way! We have a reputation to protect! Let's go do some crimes!

Bonus points for anyone recognizing the movie quotation. And I'll have a post soon about the Sheriffs Dept. proposal, which Calwatch posted to Twitter, but I need to read through the damn thing first.


John Clifford said...

You've been snooping around my private papers? Yes, there was a relationship with Adenoid Hynkel, I I swear that the plans never changed hands. Besides, if he'd bought a suit he'd have gotten two pairs of plans.

Pride in Garfield Park said...

And I plea the fifth on that whole cup cake ploy.